My mate Chris (yes I have friends in the real word) has a shed, its normal apart from the massive ivy issue he has, which is growing up the powerline next to the shed and may cause electrical issues on the scale of mine the last weekend.
Anyway here he writes about solving the problem.
There it was – my power pole – standing there swathed in ivy –
erupting, rocket-like from the rear of my shed.
You see it was the only thing that put us off the purchase as we
looked at buying our home, almost two years ago, a low-voltage power
line ran across the southern tip of the beautiful garden.
The supporting pole sat midway between the roadside and a sleepy,
cow-filled field and was covered with ivy over two-thirds of it’s
height, which kind of made it appear as an organic extension of my
We became accustomed to it – in much the same way as some people fail
to register when the 1800 from Waterloo is thundering through their
back garden, or the students next door are playing the best of Burt
Bacharach, at volume and on repeat.
But as the years passed, the ivy grew nearer and nearer to the power
lines, threatening to electrocute not only my koi carp and my
daughter, but a selection of garden gnomes which had set up camp at
it’s base – much like a gaggle of multi-coloured Swampies.
Well protest as much as they might … I love my carp, and my daughter
too, and the growing risk was just too high. It was time to call in
the power people – who in true Jack and the Beanstalk stylee reduced
the luxuriant growth to a pile of potential kindling and compost,
within two strenuous hours, utilising weaponry that would have ninja
warriors nodding and purring
It’s a strange, bare sight now, with a poodle-esque topping. I hope to
grow something new around it, pleasing the gnomes and the Mrs. But
now I think about it – I’ve always fancied a totem pole – and this one
just might be hand carved to celebrate Shed year 2008